Wow!

This morning, Kent was a sweetie and let me sleep in. Considering I was up late last night, it was a nice thing for him to do.

What was so special? We went on a date night! :) My sister watched the girls, and we headed to dinner. A filet mignon and two mojitos were my choice, which is odd because I never, ever drink. And after a half mojito I was already a little buzzy. However, I decided I do like mojitos, but they aren't quite as good as Terminators...

I digress.

Anyway, after dinner we were going to see a movie, but we kept missing the times. The theatre we wanted to go to wasn't even showing anything until after 10, so we ended up spending an hour or so at Barnes & Noble, then driving around to find something to do.

We couldn't find anything to do. No comedy clubs, nothing obvious. There is no center of town here, so there's not even anyplace to walk around. Apparently you need to know where all the bars are, if that's your thing, because we couldn't even find any of those that we wanted to go to. Again, not like we're part of the bar crowd. I'm afraid two mojitos is my limit. Kent's is one mudslide. We're just not the partying type.

So we finally ended up--I am not kidding you--going to WalMart. We found a couple little toys for Karalyn, and Kent got some things for his class. The highlight for me was when I decided I didn't want to say I didn't do ANYTHING unusual (other than the mojitos) so I found a kid's bike with training wheels and rode that up and down the aisles a couple times.

I think the mojitos were still in effect at that point.

At 10:30, we finally got a donut and admitted defeat. The town had beaten us. There is NOTHING TO DO HERE.

However...

Sunday comes, and I finally got up at 11 a.m.; as I said, Kent was a sweetie to let me sleep. Maddy, very oddly, found my race number from the Kaiser-Permanente 5-miler I ran back in October, and brought it to me when I was just waking up.

"Look what I found, Mom!"

I glared at that number. Five miles. It was taunting me. It was also a bit freaky--I'd been lying there, debating: did I want to run four miles today, or aim for five?

Stupid number.

I got up and got ready for a run. But first, a quick pop onto Facebook to update my status.

Yes I am that addicted!

I posted that I was debating four or five miles, and a treadmill run at the Y (this had been my plan), but that I was considering a trail run by the Sundial Bridge. Up until I looked out the window, the Y was firmly in my sights. But it was so sunny and cool, it seemed like perfect running weather.

My friend's daughter immediately posted me back, "Go for a run on the trails. More fun than the Y. Wish I could run a mile!"

That did it. I fueled up with a banana and a bit of peanut butter, took two bottles of water, and drove out to the bridge.

The beginning of the run was a little hard. The first mile of a run is always the hardest, until you get your stride and your legs warm up. But considering I had run, at most, 4 minutes at a shot, I was definitely still rocky. However, I decided that this would be the day. I was going to run a mile, straight through. It's a familiar path, and I thought I could do it. I decided not to dwell on time or speed, but simply to "put in the distance."

I kept repeating that: "Simply do the distance. Put in the distance. It's all about the mileage. Forget the time. Forget the speed." And I kept at it.

Halfway through my mile, I got the ridiculous urge to make it two miles.

Ridiculous? I'll say! The last time I ran a consecutive mile without stopping was October. I am not sure when is the last time I ran two straight through without stopping. We might have to go back to September or even August!

But the thought was there. "I can do it," I argued with myself, listening to my iPod and trying not to notice the strong headwind blowing in my face. "I can do this. I can run for 24 minutes."

24 minutes is what I figured it would take to get to the 2-mile turnaround point, which I had memorized from my couch-to-10K program of last fall. That would be a 12-minute mile, and a good pace. Easy. Not too speedy, not too focused on time.

I kept at it. It was hard. It was really hard. But as I passed the mile marker, I permitted myself a little bit of a grin. I'd done a mile--ok. One more.

14 minutes passed. 16. 18. At 18, I told myself, "2/3 of the way through now."

19. 20. 21. 22...and then suddenly, I saw it. It was my turnaround--the 2 mile marker. But I was too close for it to be 24 minutes! Was I on a faster pace than I thought?

I hit the marker at 23:13, which made it for just over an 11 1/2 minute per mile pace.

Whoah! I did it! And faster than I had thought I would!

I felt great, but that was nothing compared to the rest of the run.

Today was the kind of day I haven't had since my last Presidential 5-mile loop in Kennebunkport, last October. The next 3 1/2 miles--yes, I did 5 1/2 in all today--started to be more about fun than about plodding or tired legs. I decided I'd aim for 4 minutes run, 30 seconds walking, or therabouts, as I had been doing all week. But somehow the four minutes blew past and I was suddenly at five before I decided to slow down and walk a little.

It was so cool. I was focusing on the view, which frankly is magnificent--there may be no nightlife, but the recreational activities for daytime are fantastic!--and I was so busy watching the river, and the snow-capped mountain in the distance, and the ducks and geese flying overhead, I kept forgetting that I was running.

How's that for amazing! I forgot what I was doing and just ran, and now and again I'd walk and stretch--the stretching was crucial, I'm still very stiff and my flexibility is shot. But I'd walk and stretch, then start to dance a bit to the music, and before I knew it the dance turned into a run, almost without my noticing!

There was so much joy and freedom in it...I wish I could explain it, but with every step I felt more like myself than I have for the last eight months, ever since we moved to California.

I felt like I was coming home to me. It was...amazing. It was cathartic. It was a revelation.

I might not like where I am, but I can still be me while I'm here. It doesn't have to be the way it was when we first arrived--the stress, the negativity, the heaviness of spirit!

Wow!

The run ended up being one of the most FUN runs I have had in months. I really just enjoyed the day. The weather was perfect, the temperature cold enough to keep me cooled off while I ran. The people were all friendly, waving or smiling or simply nodding as I passed. I felt like so much more than I have been for months. I did what felt like an easy run/walk, but it was more time running and less walking than I've done since last year.

It was all just so cool!

I know, I'm gushing. I can't help it. LOL. I'm sure later on I'll edit the daylights out of this post, but for now I'm letting it stand.

I had the best day! And the rest of it--well it was just fun and easy and calm. And I felt good. I cleaned the house, and made three different nut butters (peanut butter, cashew butter, and almond butter); I played with the girls, and got them dinner, put them to bed and even read with Maddy. And it was easy and fun and enjoyable and relaxing.

Wow. I was relaxed! What a concept! I haven't been relaxed in...you guessed it! MONTHS! LOL!

And after the last few months I've had...well, that was a revelation in and of itself!

I'll end this now before it gets too gushy, LOL! I did want to add that while I was running, I suddenly really listened to the lyrics of a particular song. Yes, it's from High School Musical II, and yes I do listen to that music. It's from my daughter's CD, but I like it too. It's fun and upbeat and I like musicals. So sue me. :)

But, as I ran, the lyrics kind of caught me and made me think, OK, yeah, this is about being MYSELF, for the first time in a long time. I'll post a little bit of them below. See what you think.

Have a great day, and as always...have fun!

________________________________________________________________

They say that you should follow
and chase down what you dream,
but if you get lost and lose yourself
what does is really mean?

No matter where we’re going,
it starts from where we are.
There’s more to life when we listen to our hearts
and because of you, I’ve got the strength to start

Everyday
of our lives,
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight
Gonna run
while we’re young
and keep the faith.